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@ 1st January 1970

Friday, September 7th, 2018
Tomorrow’s propaganda – today!

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Douchebags relax as #MeToo movement sputters in China

BEIJING (China Daily Show) — Sleazy men are finally relaxing, after a dangerous foreign threat to traditional Chinese culture wass quietly strangled at birth

‘Our mousetrap is open,’ Xi assures markets

BOAO — China’s economy welcomes foreign investment, President Xi Jinping has assured delegates, comparing its market to a “vast mousetrap”

‘Woke’ teen realizes that entire world engaged in plot to contain China

SHENYANG (China Daily Show) – Jin Sun, 17, has recently realized that the entire West is, in fact, engaged in a simultaneous plot to contain China.

It’s Started, People! President Xi Jinping Stabbed a Waitress to Death at China’s Parliament and Everyone Just Nervously Applauded

All Chinese people love the “Two Sessions” period, in which elected officials from all around the country convene in the capital to do whatever they’re told.

China to reopen next week as Qing-style authoritarian shopping mall

(BEIJING) — China’s State Council has announced plans to close the country for a short period, and re-open as a Qing-style theme park, with time-honored brands and the biggest parking lot in the world.

Internal Affairs
Chinese billionaires sing and dance at Politburo Christmas party
20 Dec 2017

BEIJING (China Daily Show) — A procession of Chinese billionaires performed an hour-long revue of skits, songs and sobbing pleas for mercy at the annual Politburo Christmas party this week.

We Chinese
We Chinese: What do you think of AlphaGo’s victory over human opponent Ke Jie?
24 May 2017

AlphaGo, a Google AI machine, defeated Chinese grandmaster Ke Jie at Go yesterday, in a match that was banned from broadcast by China’s censors. What do you think?

Editor's Choice
Which Chinese dynasty are you?
21 Mar 2018

To celebrate the dawn of a new dynasty, take our China Daily Show test — fully accredited by the Chinese Academy of Approved Sciences — to find out which dynasty you are!

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  8. CCTV to screen full Director’s Cut of ‘Caligula’

  9. Politburo: Mao’s hairstyle ‘70% right, 30% wrong’

  10. Shenzhen Airlines tops worldwide ‘sluttiest stewardess’ poll

  11. Tainted milk causes Chinese women to ‘grow breasts’

  12. Shaun Rein to be ‘discontinued’: CCP

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