Ask a foreign woman who hasn’t had a date in eight months

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Dear foreign woman who hasn’t had a date in eight months,

I am having an ongoing problem with my “modern” Beijing apartment management office. My utility bills are up to date, yet they keep billing me and turning off my power, gas and water – both hot and cold, separately and together – seemingly at random, which makes it very inconvenient to shower in the dark or boil noodles, while showering in the dark.

My efforts so far to resolve the problem have been fruitless. The apartment owner lives in Canada, the office claims only the owner or the banks who handle the utilities can authorize payments or changes and the bank takes my money (4,018.2 yuan so far) happily with no results. Any suggestions?

Yours,

Tired of eating and bathing at KFC

 

I’m sick of ignorant, prejudiced Western men but I really don’t like Chinese guys

Foreign woman who hasn’t had a date in eight months says:

Er, hello? I’m an attractive, intelligent American woman with an Oberlin master’s degree. You’d think guys would be all over me, right? Right, girls? Duh – wrong!

I’ve been in China for eight months setting up an NGO  but have yet to have an intelligent conversation with another North American, English or even Welsh guy who isn’t knee-walking drunk, young enough to be my little brother, some sort of sex-crime exile or doesn’t think a past participle is a “bitchin’” party that he’s missed.

Sure, I have my opinions but who doesn’t? I say it like I see it and if you don’t like that, well, hit the road, Jack.

It’s not like I’m particularly demanding.  All I’m looking for is an active, smart, sweet, preferably bi-lingual man who loves life and the outdoors and is happy to cook and clean.

Someone with whom I can discuss who is the best George (Sand or Eliot) and who also (it’s Eliot) enjoys horses, dogs, swimming, tango, mambo, the early works of Radclyffe Hall, cuddling, the Iditarod and is non-smoking. But I guess that’s just a little too much to ask, isn’t it?

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Next week: Ask the mean lady at the Beijing Exit-Entry Administration Bureau

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  • Notbovvered1984

    Wonder what the sisterhood talks their way out of this one? Honestly I tried to be offended I really did

  • slama-lama

    Hilarious. If they’re knee-walking drunk, you’re probably looking in the wrong place. Where to look? No idea. Join some club that does tango, or go to a swimming pool, or maybe there’s a cooking club. Activities you enjoy are a good way to meet people (with similar interests!)

  • slab

    sand fucked frederic chopin. ftw

  • Le Bido

    maybe if you stop eating the food always you will be thinner and some guys will like to date you haha

  • Le Bido

    will someone like to chat to me. i am lonelly

  • Le Bido

    so lonelly

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  • http://twitter.com/mobilelawyer Michael Hodson

    LOL — this post did crack me up. I totally know the people you are talking about here. But 8 months without a single good conversation is horrible. I wish you the best of luck… and maybe a vacation to a better location for a bit.

  • Avengermojo

    Sorry I’m taken :)

  • Avengermojo

    Btw you can try going to the Church :) Since only foreigners can go and I’m sure most of them won’t be drunk there :)

  • Avengermojo

    Also… switch your apartment now. It is non-sense :) Look for new apartment with modern management.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1153482719 Dan Siebers

    I wish I would have met you before I left China! I am an American who was living 10 years in Beijing, and left because I couldn’t find a smart, strong, engaging woman like you. I didn’t have a date in a year and a half before I left. Your profile is pretty much the description of my ideal woman (minus the negativity and projection of frustration)

    Although I speak fluent Chinese, the culture of conversation there was too far from what I need in a relationship. Although I was in two long term relationships with beautiful, kind and honest women, the lack of engaging conversation was a serious problem.

    The other problem is that Western women often make extremely negative opinions (see above) and then mass generalize them to 100% of all western men. Whenever I tried to date Western women, they just refused to believe that I was not the stereotype.

    I was and am not alone on this, I have/had several male friends in Beijing with the same problems and frustrations as myself (about 1/3 of them). Some of them give up, some of them try to find a Chinese who has lived abroad for several years, and some leave. Instead of just giving up and becoming the stereotype, I threw away my very strong career in China and left to get my Masters in Europe.

    Wherever you are meeting the losers you describe, STOP GOING THERE :) Have faith and don’t overgeneralize!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1153482719 Dan Siebers

    I wish I would have met you before I left China! I am an American who was living 10 years in Beijing, and left because I couldn’t find a smart, strong, engaging woman. I didn’t have a date in a year and a half before I left. Your profile is pretty much the description of my ideal woman (minus the negativity and projection of frustration)

    Although I speak fluent Chinese, the culture of conversation there was too far from what I need in a relationship. Although I was in two long term relationships with beautiful, kind and honest women, the lack of engaging conversation was a serious problem.

    The other problem is that Western women often make extremely negative opinions (see above) and then mass generalize them to 100% of all western men. Whenever I tried to date Western women, they just refused to believe that I was not the stereotype.

    I was and am not alone on this, I have/had a several friends in Beijing with the same problems and frustrations as myself. Some of them give up, some of them try to find a Chinese who has lived abroad for several years.

    Have faith and don’t overgeneralize! And wherever you are meeting the losers you describe, STOP GOING THERE :)

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  • Marilyn

    Where is the contact info? I have a very nice funny smart American guy (who’s been single for a while) to introduce to you. Leave your email address, seriously.