China experts ‘cracking up’

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By XI MEITEI
Western Media Correspondent

China expert David Shambaugh estimates the size of his ego yesterday

A China expert estimates his own importance yesterday

BEIJING (China Daily Show) – Confidence in leading China experts is on the verge of collapse, analysts have warned.

After decades of impressive, double-digit growth, some now believe the market for theories about China’s future has entered its endgame. “Entire schools of thought about its impending supremacy or collapse may no longer be effective click-bait,” eminent Sinologist, philanthropist and basket-weaver Sir William Buckfast warned on Facebook.

Since as far back as the 1950s, foreign experts could climb to the top of Hong Kong’s Victoria Peak, take a long squint toward the mainland, and accurately pronounce the impending fate of China. Today, many spend up to three weeks in a Shanghai hotel, bonding with local officials, before casting their oracle bones.

For some, though, the coming crackup of foreign prognostication could still be decades away. “Right now, there’s still a sustainable market for Huffington Post editorials,” noted Sir William. “But various signs show that the long-term value of their meaningless predictions is waning.”

Citing several reasons for the declining interest, Sir William pointed out that Sinologists have “overplayed a weak hand,” with readers beginning to ignore ‘grand narrative’ China books in droves – a phenomenon known as “reader flight.”

“I’ve noticed recently just how bored everyone is,” added Sir William. “While it’s true that China experts have always been pretty boring, it’s become clear, from several recent book talks, that many members of the audience are barely able to keep their eyes open until the Q&A session – let alone marshal the energy to then make a long, open-ended statement masquerading as a question.”

At the time of going to press, a Storify blog chronicling Twitter reactions to Sir William’s controversial Facebook comments was being swiftly compiled.

Follow the coming whatever of China with @chinadailyshow on Twitter

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  • Chaz

    So, so true….

  • Joe

    *coughJeffreyWasserstromcough*

  • I’ve never heard of this Buckfast character. What the sinowatching scene needs is more Cuacasian Chinese voices.