Following Spring Break, Chen Guangcheng to endure grueling Phi Kappa Delta hazing ritual

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By TIANTIAN XIANGSHANG
Education Correspondent

Fortunately, Chen will not have to witness such shocking sights as this

BEIJING (China Daily Show) –  Human rights workers have warned that the Chinese government may attempt revenge on blind student-activist Chen Guangcheng through a series of elaborate university hazing rituals.

A controversial deal, brokered by US officials, has allowed disabled lawyer Chen to join his family and safely attend law school, following a dramatic escape to Beijing last week.

The Chinese also threw in a sweetener: Chen’s wife would not get beaten to death, in exchange for the mild punishment of having to stay overnight in Chaoyang Hospital.

But many have suggested that Beijing cannot be trusted to stick to its promises and will come down hard on Chen, once US officials leave after Spring Break. Some reports even indicate the deal is already breaking down.

Chen is considering a number of tuition options, including the offer of a Baccalaureate in Advanced Metalwork at the University of Nottingham, but is said to be leaning towards continuing his legal studies at the Beijing Number 4 Law and Agricultural School.

After enrolling as an undergraduate, Chen can look forward to canteen food, 10pm curfews, dorm life, weekend homework and many other student delights, typical of Chinese universities.

But there will also be unpleasant aspects to Chen’s life on campus.

Insiders say the house Chen has applied to join – Phi Kappa Delta , whose motto is “Firmly Support the Central Committee” – is a staunchly state-affiliated fraternity, and plans are said to be afoot to greet Chen with a series of arcane and unpleasant hazing rituals.

“Forget chugging beer bongs. This isn’t gonna be panty-raid stuff. We’re going to hit this mofo with some serious, press-ups-in-the-rain, Code Red shit,” claimed an excitable fenqing freshman, who had recently viewed A Few Good Men.

Plans seen by China Daily Show include paddling, waking Chen up with a bullhorn and the odd mild beating.

But Chen is said to have supporters elsewhere on the Number 4 campus.

“I heard this Chen’s some kind of blonde activist,” said Dragon House fraternity brother Bai “Bluto” Lushe. “He should come here. We goddamn love blondes.”

Spring Break is traditionally the period in China in which underprivileged scholars and persecuted human-rights activists attempt to escape illegal detention. Chen travelled all the way to the US Embassy to post his application to study law and Hillary Clinton, in town for trade talks, personally wrote his letter of referral.

Government sources meanwhile denied Chen’s escape was a humiliation for them.

“The guy was blind and sick. How the hell were we supposed to know he’d get out?” argued one Linyi official. “This could have happened to anyone. Nobody saw this coming – nobody except Chen.

“OK, that’s quite ironic,” he admitted.

Follow breaking China news at @chinadailyshow on Twitter

Sample questions from Chen’s upcoming state-hazing exam

How many blind activists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Correct answer: None. Under China’s benevolent 2009 Disabilities Act, blind people are prevented from participating in any dangerous activities, such as changing lightbulbs, crossing roads or representing defendants in court.

 How long is the distance between Linyi, Shandong province and Beijing?

Correct answer: Many hundred of miles, across mountains, rivers and forests that often prevent decent authorities in the capital from detecting certain potentially wrongful activities being committed by a few corrupt cadres in the countryside.

 Is it legal for a Chinese person to escape his kidnappers and enter a foreign embassy?

Correct answer: While the legal answer is technically ‘no,’ from an extralegal point of view, it is extra-illegal for a Chinese citizen to hang out with foreigners and make a scene that might embarrass certain parties and hurt the feelings of the Chinese people.

Follow breaking China news at @chinadailyshow on Twitter

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