Honorable businessman is dead-drunk


Society Correspondent

‘I’m just gonna drink this coffee, hurl, then head back to the office’

CHENGDU (China Daily Show) – A Chinese businessman was escorted intoxicated and helpless from a small Sichuanese restaurant yesterday, as eyewitnesses report the time was approximately four-thirty in the afternoon.

The red-faced entrepreneur was seen attempting to pay his bill for the third time – even though his wallet was on the floor – while angrily refusing any money from his companions. The man later stumbled, clearing a whole table of beer bottles and hongshaorou while reaching for the fallen wallet.

Fellow diners have confirmed that the 38-year-old executive repeatedly reminded onlookers– in sometimes-explicit terms – that he was not only a “successful businessman” but also “honorable.”

Passers-by outside exchanged indifferent glances at the sight of the hardworking father-of-two being assisted to a nearby car and handed his keys by a trio of laughing, similarly inebriated associates.

Neighbours were quick to pass comment on the atypical scene.

“It’s not even dark yet,” tutted local gossip Ma Jin, 53. “I’m just disappointed there were no children around to witness this outrage.”

Local law enforcement had a message to pass on, too.

“Man, that guy is majorly fucked-up,” chuckled patrolman Wang Du. “What time is it – nearly five? That’s impressive.”

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  • loll

    amazing. so funny